Love Potion, this!
by BewilderedLoca
Summary: Bankotsu goes to desperate measures to get Kagura to fall for him, he figures a love potion should do the trick... too bad it ends in disaster. Rated M to be safe.


"You know, you should've told one of us you were leaving." Suikotsu began to say.

"He did, He told _us_!" Jakotsu smirked.

"You do realize," Renkotsu pointed at Jakotsu, "Telling him was a bad idea?"

"Well yeah, but I needed someone to keep Naraku off my back and InuYasha out my way." Bankotsu shrugged. "Just don't tell anyone where I left."

"Oh noo, we won't say anything." Jakotsu snickered, "We won't blab away your secret."

"Yeah, we just wanna watch what happens." Suikotsu grinned.

"Whatever, just stay out of the way." Bankotsu said while spraying himself with the love potion, that he bought from a witch a short while back.

"Ick," Jakotsu covered his nose, "THAT'S supposed to make Kagura fall in love with you? Gross."

Renkotsu and Suikotsu made the same face, "It really does stink."

"Hey, it's suppose to work on girls! Not on you guys!" Bankotsu defended himself, scrunching his nose as well.

"Well obviously, THAT backfired." Jakotsu snickered.

"Hey! What are you four doing here?" Hakudoshi asked with her arms crossed.

"Uhmmm, looking for grapes?" Bankotsu started to say while looking for grapes to pick.

"Try the vineyard over there," Hakudoshi pointed, "Nice try though. So what are you really doing here? Wait… what's that smell?"

"Bankotsu's love potion." Jakotsu answered.

"JAKOTSU!" Bankotsu glared.

"What, it's Hakudoshi. What can he do?" Jakotsu shrugged, ignoring the death glare Bankotsu gave him.

"Love potion, you say?" Hakudoshi inquired, "Go on with this mythical lie."

Bankotsu sighed, "Look, it's just a potion I bought from a grueling witch across the border."

"Wow. Even that sounds fishy." Suikotsu blinked, while Bankotsu looked over and mouthed, 'Shut up.'

"And you intend on using it on Kagura…?" Hakudoshi asked again.

"Mhmmm." Bankotsu nodded, waiting for him to threaten to tell her.

"Well," Hakudoshi thought it over, "This I gotta see."

Jakotsu grinned, "Isn't that delightful! Now you don't have to worry about him or us, telling on you!"

"Isn't that just peachy?" Bankotsu groaned.

--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--

Bankotsu roamed around the castle, in search of Kagura but found no luck in finding her. "Where the fuck could've she gone?" he groaned.

"Maybe with that elder dog heir, Sesshoumaru." Hakudoshi pointed out. "This is getting rather boring."

"Oh yeah, we've been circling around the castle for an hour." Renkotsu sighed.

"And my legs getting tired," Suikotsu said while rotating his legs, to make sure they weren't numb.

"And I'm thirsty!" Jakotsu whined.

"Fine, what do you suggest we do then?" Bankotsu snapped.

"Get you and the rest of us a drink." Jakotsu advised, "Atleast then we'll know, we'll do something different and stupid."

"Point taken." Bankotsu agreed.

--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--==--

The group eventually found themselves in a quieted down village and raided them for their worth's. Soon after, they stopped for a drink and reclined on damaged scaffoldings.

"This bites." Bankotsu groaned.

"Tell me about it, no chicks, no errors, nothing hilarious." Suikotsu grumbled while chugging down sake.

"We need some action," Jakotsu whined, "and soon."

Just then they heard a shout, "Bankotsu!"

The group looked over and Jakotsu grinned, "InuYasha! I knew you'd come!"

"Shut up," InuYasha made a face, "Destroyed another village, huh?"

"Pretty much. Nothing fun happened today." Bankotsu shrugged.

"So, you'll take young innocent lives as enjoyment?" Miroku glared.

"Uhmm, what the fuck do you think WE do for a living?"

"Drink and kill." Sango snapped.

"Hey, she pretty much got it down." Bankotsu clapped, "I'm impressed."

Sango growled and swung her Hirakotsu, "Just shut up and die already!"

Bankotsu grinned and skip-sided away. "Well that's just no fun at all." He said before pulling Banryu out from the earth ground.

"Why you…" Sango paused and sniffed the air, "—you handsome devil you." She walked up to him and gave him a coy look.

"Huh?" Bankotsu blinked.

"Face it, why don't you come join us in our group?" Sango smirked, "Atleast then you wouldn't have to worry about us always trying to kill you?"

"Well, that's a nice offer really… but still." Bankotsu started to back away and Sango moved up closer.

"Atleast we know this stuff works," Jakotsu grinned while the other two tried to hold their laughter in.

"Sango, what do you think you're doing?!" InuYasha blinked, "HE'S OUR ENEMY!"

"SHUT UP!" She snarled causing everyone else to recoil. "Anyway, like I was saying…"

"Uhh Sango, I think you got the wrong person… honest!" Bankotsu nervously walked away. "It's not me you want… its' him" he said pointing to Miroku.

"Oh don't talk about him, Mr. Personality," she scoffed. "He's more into other women instead of me, besides you meet my standards." She said, twirling her finger around his bangs.

"HEY!" Miroku glared.

"I still think you're confused…" Bankotsu nervously said while pushing her off, gently. "It's not me you want."

"Sure it is, you're tall, dark, sexy…" Sango flashed him a look and pulled him close.

"Uhh, guys… a little help here?" Bankotsu looked over, shook up abit while Sango began kissing the side of his face.

"Oh no," Suikotsu drawled.

"You told us to back off and stay out your way, remember?" Renkotsu snickered.

"Yeah but… GUYS!" Bankotsu whined until Sango pulled him for a passionate kiss and copped a feel.

Suikotsu and Jakotsu were roaring in laughter while Renkotsu fell on side crying in delight while laughing the same way the other two did. Meanwhile, InuYasha and Kagome gaped and Miroku growled.

"This is a disaster!" Suikotsu cried out.

"No no," Renkotsu calmed himself down abit. "See that, THAT'S A DISASTER!" He pointed at Miroku, who stomped his way over to pull her away.

"BANKOTSU, WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?" Miroku shouted.

"This is getting good," Jakotsu snickered.

"Take your hands off of her!" Miroku growled, shoving him. "What do you think you are…OWW!" Miroku yelped once Sango kneeled him in his sensitive area.

"Some guys just can't the hint!" Sango scoffed as Kagome walked up, "Yeah what's your big idea? Why are you… ooh." Kagome grinned.

"Oh god no." Bankotsu stared at both females, looking at him ready to ravish him at any given moment. "Not you two!" Bankotsu groaned.

"What's all this ruckus?" Hakudoshi came out and blinked. "Whoa, who knew he had it in him?"

"Hey... Kagome!" InuYasha called, after prying Kagome off of Bankotsu, "What's wrong with you? First its Sango and then you too!"

She shrugged him off, "Back off! I'm trying to get some here!"

"Whoa." Jakotsu blinked and went into a long pause before laughing his poor heart out again.

"GUYS!!" Bankotsu whined.

"KAGOME!" InuYasha yelled.

"SANGO!" Miroku shouted before trying to stand up, slowly.

"My hips!" Renkotsu held onto his side, still bawling out on laughter. Just then two whirlwinds pulled up and stopped right before the scene.

"I told you once already, Ayame! Enough is enough!" Kouga snapped.

"But you promised me!" Ayame snarled.

"Well that's nothing but… HEY!" Kouga growled while watching the scene take place before him. "Who's big idea was this? Why are you kissing my Kagome!"

"Hey, she isn't yours!" InuYasha glared.

Bankotsu pulled away and groaned, "I'm not kissing her! She's kissing me!" he said before roughly pushing them both off. "It's an accident."

"Oh yeah sure," Kouga drawled, pretending to believe him.

"Honest to God," Bankotsu pointed out while pulling the potion from his armor.

"Look, I don't know what your game is…" Kouga shoved him.

"I think we have a clue." Jakotsu snickered.

"But you ain't gonna lay any of that stuff on Kagome anymore!" Kouga shoved him again, which accidentally had Bankotsu to release the lid and spilled some on Kouga and InuYasha.

"UGH, what is this stuff!?" InuYasha covered his nose.

"You got it all over my fur!" Kouga growled, doing the same thing.

"It's uh… something I got for someone." Bankotsu shrugged.

"What, like for Kagura?" Kouga groaned," Don't you think you should've waited until SHE came by?"

Bankotsu blinked, "I never even thought of that…"

"What an idiot." Hakudoshi rolled his eyes.

"What do you mean for Kagura?" InuYasha covered half his face, "You have Kagome and Sango all over you!"

"But do you honestly think I want them!" Bankotsu growled as both girls shoved InuYasha and Kouga off.

Ayame rolled her eyes and stomped over, "Look I don't have time for this anymore, let's just go and get this over with…" she paused.

Kouga blanched. "I hope it's not me."

Ayame smirked and whirled at InuYasha's direction, "Thank god it's you." Kouga sighed in relief.

"Huh?" InuYasha blinked as Ayame grabbed onto his arm and looked up at him, "Have you been working out?"

"Well… somewhat yeah," InuYasha blinked, "Why?"

"It shows… a lot." She then gave him this weird look. "You know InuYasha, you are kind of cute. I was beginning to wonder what you saw in a ditz like Kagome when you can have a hot willing girl waiting for you at the other side?"

"W-What other side?" InuYasha gulped.

"That." She pointed to close by hut and winked. InuYasha gulped and started to back away. Ayame followed him, "So it's a date?"

"What is this foul scent?" Sesshoumaru asked, walking along the road and near the group and stopped when he saw Ayame kissing the side of InuYasha's face. "Ayame? What the devil are you doing kissing my brother?"

"Hey Sesshoumaru! Oh, we're dating now!" Ayame grinned, "Just think, if we get married, we'll be in-laws!"

Sesshoumaru just stared while Renkotsu fought to separate the fight between Kouga and Bankotsu. The harsh push caused the vial to spill out Bankotsu's hand and it sprayed both Renkotsu and Sesshoumaru. "That's just GREAT!" Renkotsu groaned as Sesshoumaru snarled.

"I just washed this!" Sesshoumaru groaned.

"I smell funny!" Renkotsu scrunched his nose.

"I'mma just die laughing!" Jakotsu laughed.

"That's sounds nice." Hakudoshi smirked.

Kouga looked over at Ayame and frowned, "Wait, what are you doing with him?" he asked, oblivious to the whole drama that occurred.

"He came to see me." Ayame purred.

"Oh no no! I just came here because I found him," InuYasha pointed to Bankotsu, "—killing people… Ayame will you stop!?"

"Ooh baby," she grinned and pounced on him and smothered him with kisses like a wolf in heat.

Kouga growled and pulled her off of him and held InuYasha in a strangle hold. Ayame gained her balance and pushed him off. "OWW!" Kouga yelled.

"Oh my poor baby!" Ayame ran to him, "Want me to kiss it better?"

"NO!" InuYasha scooted away.

Kouga got a whiff of himself, "Eww, this stuff REALLY is gross."

"YOU DON'T THINK?!" Renkotsu said trying to wash his bandana while Sesshoumaru with his haori.

"Sango… why are you kissing Bankotsu? Isn't he suppose to be… AYAME WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?"

Ayame was helping InuYasha up, rubbing her hands all over his body, "I'm just helping my man!"

"Your man?" Kouga growled, "This isn't funny anymore!"

"Who said it was!" Ayame growled, "You leave me for Kagome because I guess I'm not good enough! Well now I have a MAN!"

Kouga growled and pointed a finger at Bankotsu, who was busy pushing Sango away. "You have some explaining to do!"

"What makes you think I had something to do with it?" He asked.

"Because trouble always happens when you're around!" Miroku snapped, now trying to push Kagome away.

"Hey what's this noise all about?" Abi came in with Kikyou. "I'm trying to catch some live food for mother and… whoa Sango what are you doing with Bankotsu?"

"Hi Abi!" she waved cheerfully, "I'm his girlfriend now!"

"NO! No she's not!" Bankotsu protested.

"Wow, I never saw him turn a girl down." Kikyou blinked.

"Me too." Abi paused and scrunched her nose. Kikyou sighed and stopped. She walked over to Renkotsu and smiled dearly at him.

"Oh…." Jakotsu stopped to stare but laughed harder at Renkotsu's retreating form and Sesshoumaru's glare.

"Aww, don't run." Kikyou grinned. "I don't bite… much." Soon after Renkotsu was found running while Kikyou chased after him.

Jakotsu almost choked down laughing while Suikotsu fell off his chair, bawling in laughter. Hakudoshi snickered as Sesshoumaru growled.

"This is the last time I walk down HERE!!" he yelped when he felt someone pinch his ass. He turned around and saw a smirking Abi.

"You know for a dog, I think I can tame you." Abi grinned. "Add the bed, minus the clothes, divide the legs and don't pray for multiple whips."

Sesshoumaru gulped for once and started to back away. "ABI what are you doing!?" Hiten stormed in.

"What's it look like?" Abi snapped and pulled Sesshoumaru's arm.

"Picking daises, I hope!" Hiten growled.

"Tch, I found someone nicer and more willing to put out!" Abi stuck her tongue out.

Hiten growled and looked over, knowing the cause of this drama, "Who bought this from the grueling witch?!" He picked up the vial cautiously and held it up.

Kouga pointed at Bankotsu, "What the hell were you THINKING?"

"Hey, it's was a good plan at first!" Bankotsu defended himself before Sango started to tug at his sash.

"Well now you have all this bitches' wild in heat!" Hiten snarled.

"Don't you think I KNOW that already?" Bankotsu grunted, trying to keep his sash far from Sango's reach.

"NO! Because if you did, you'd be more careful!" Hiten reprimanded

Jakotsu scoffed, "Tch, since when was Bankotsu _ever_ careful?"

"Kikyou, I mean it!" Renkotsu ran behind Kouga, "NO MEANS NO!"

"Hey!" Kouga pulled back, "I have no girls on me, I'd like to keep it that way!"

"Oh C'mon!" Kikyou tackled him. "It's just a kiss!"

"A very bad kiss, I don't want!" Renkotsu tried to push her away but she somehow got to him and kissed all over his face.

"Kikyou!" Sesshoumaru growled but then yelped.

"ABI!" Abi whacked him again. "Say it now, Abi."

"What are you a dominatrix?" Sesshoumaru rubbed his bum. Hiten sighed and sprayed some of the potion on himself. "You have NO idea."

"C'mon Bankotsu. Another feel, please?" Sango wrestled around with Bankotsu.

"NO!"

"Ayame!"

"C'mon, everyone loves a virgin." She purred, trying to strip him.

"Sadly, you're not my type." InuYasha tried to push away, "Oh, so you have the schoolgirl fetish thing going on? I think I can fit into her uniform." She grinned while InuYasha blushed and groaned.

"AYAME!" Kouga yelled.

"Back off already!" she snarled before pulling InuYasha in for another kiss.

"C'mon Abi!" Hiten tried to pull her back off Sesshoumaru but failed when she pushed him off and chased after Sesshoumaru.

"OW!" Hiten fell down on his backside.

"Oh you poor thing." Hiten blinked when he felt a pair of boobs dawdling over him. He looked up and blanched. "Oh _not_ you…"

Yura blinked and pulled him close. "Everyone leaves you behind, that's no fun."

"Huh?" Hiten blinked before noticing what occurred, "Look Yura, it's not what you think…"

"I know a good hairstyle for this type of hair." She chirped running her fingers through.

"Yura, Stay back!" Hiten crawled away and pointed at her, "That's an order!"

"Ooh, I love it when a man takes charge." Yura smirked.

"NO!" Hiten got up and ran off.

"Awh, come back here!" she chased after him, "You're so cute when you're all that grouchy!"

"NOOOO!!" Hiten yelled, running past Kouga who began laughing alongside with Jakotsu, Suikotsu and Hakudoshi.

"Man, I never laughed this hard in my life!" Kouga chuckled while holding his side.

"Kagome, please! Reconsider!" Miroku said trying to push Kagome off.

"But you're just so cute!" she squealed, pecking his face.

"Yeah Sango! Take a chill pill!" Bankotsu suggested after being nuzzled to death.

"AYAME!!" InuYasha covered his eyes as Ayame strutted towards him in Kagome's uniform.

"Awh, c'mon you know it's cuter on me than her!" She told him while trying to pry his hands off his eyes.

"Kikyou stop!!" Renkotsu shouted, hiding up on tree trying to hide from her.

"You can't be away from me THAT long!" Kikyou crossed her arms.

"YEOUCH! ABI!" Sesshoumaru yelped again for the fifth time. "QUIT IT!"

Abi grinned and cracked her whip. "Again!" she whacked his bottom again, causing him to yelp again

"I mean it Yura. BACK THE FUCK OFF!" Hiten ran behind a rock, trying to trick her in the run around. Yura jumped over and tackled him, kissing all over his face and neck.

This made the other group laugh harder and tear up in delight. Kagura came up and walked beside them, "What's going…" she stopped herself and saw the sight before her. It was a rather bizarre sight. Kikyou was chasing Renkotsu, Sesshoumaru was cornered up on a tree with Abi at the bottom, Ayame was kissing all over InuYasha, Miroku was involved in a game of hide and seek from Kagome and Sango had Bankotsu involved in a twisted game of tug of war with another woman, who walked by the scene and caught whiff of Bankotsu.

"HE'S MINE!" Sango shouted.

"NO! HE'S MINE!" the woman declared.

"AHHHHH!" InuYasha screamed once he got freed of Ayame's embrace and ran off. She was soon hot on his tail.

"You can run, but you can't hide!" Ayame tackled him.

"Timber!" Abi grinned using her pike to cut the trunk of the tree, Sesshoumaru was in.

"NOOOO!" Sesshoumaru shouted before Abi tackled him.

"Sango, please! Stop! Just stop!" Bankotsu tried to escape from Sango's affections, "NO means NO!"

"Why fight it?" Sango pecked his face.

"When was Sango and Bankotsu… oh never mind" Kagura shook her head and watched.

Bankotsu looked over and gasped, "It isn't what it looks like!"

Kagura rolled her eyes, "Mhmm, sure…" she sniffed the air.

"Uh oh." Jakotsu waited with a small twist at the end of his mouth. "Who's she smelling?"

Suikotsu held his hands up, "Not me."

"Me neither," Hakudoshi blinked but then smirked.

Kouga blinked innocently and looked over. "Huh?"

"Honest to God, Kagura." Bankotsu harshly shoved Sango and the other woman off, "I don't know them!"

"Oh who cares!" Kagura waved at him, "I found someone better."

"WHAT?!" Bankotsu yelled.

"See, Bankotsu? She doesn't want you!" she grinned, "Everyone's happy!"

"I'm not!" Kouga growled watching Ayame crawl all over InuYasha, "I'm very UNHAPPY!"

"Ooh, I can take care of that!" Kagura jumped into his arms and kissed his neck.

"NOO!" Kouga dropped her and backed away, "Kagura…no."

"Tch, that means yes," Kagura grinned and stalked towards him. Kouga soon found himself backed away in the center of the field along with the others.

"Say Hiten…" Bankotsu panted.

"What?" Hiten said.

"How long does the potion work… or stay on?" Bankotsu asked.

"Depends. Either three days or three hours." Hiten answered, lifting his leg up to keep Yura safe distance away.

"What do you suggest we do?" InuYasha stuttered while Ayame gave him a perverted look.

"Run to the 100 year old tree," Renkotsu panted. "It's big and strong enough to support us all."

Bankotsu nodded, "So where is it?" He blinked when he heard no answer but only the stomps and footsteps running from a distance. "HEY!"

"Oh Bankotsu…" Sango purred.

"Wait for me!" Bankotsu ran after them.

Jakotsu fell on his knees laughing, crawling as the girls chased after them. "We HAVE to see what happens now."

--=-=-=-=-=---=-=-=-=-=--

Three hours later, the guys were still up the tree, the girls were at the bottom waiting for one to fall down while Jakotsu, Suikotsu and Hakudoshi were a distance away watching and waiting for one of them to fall. "C'MON INUYASHA!" Hakudoshi shouted. "FALL! YOUR CLOTHES ARE ALREADY GONE!"

"S-SHUT UP!" InuYasha snapped back while Suikotsu and Hakudoshi laughed.

Jakotsu nudged them, "Don't pick on him!"

"Pick on who?" Naraku came up, oblivious to what had transpired.

"Him." Hakudoshi pointed while Naraku stared, at the men crawled up on a tree while the women were waiting for them like angry cheetahs at the bottom.

"What's wrong?" Naraku asked, still not finding the problem as bad.

"LOOK AT THEM!" Hiten pointed below.

Naraku sighed and rolled his eyes, "Tell me, who did you get this from?"

"The grueling witch from road... I think!" Bankotsu yelped when Sango was close to grabbing his leg.

"And you all are going to stay there for three days?"

"Do you have a better option?!" Kouga yelled.

"Actually I do. All you have to do is splash water on the person who is affected." He answered briefly.

The men on the tree stood quiet while Jakotsu, Suikotsu and Hakudoshi laughed louder while pointing at them. Naraku joined soon after.

"Just splash water? That's it?" Hiten grumbled.

"Yes." Naraku nodded while Hiten looked over, "Who wants to get the water?"

"I can't." Bankotsu admitted.

"Neither can I." Renkotsu added in. All the guys had a good excuse, all except for Kouga.

"No." Kouga shook his head.

"C'mon, take one for the team." Miroku nudged.

"No!" Kouga furiously shook his head, "Fuck ya'll! I wasn't the one who came up with this stupid idea."

"Yeah but look at Bankotsu." InuYasha pointed out. "He's already whipped to shape."

"I think you're confusing me with your brother." Bankotsu snickered while Sesshoumaru glared.

Renkotsu groaned and pushed Kouga off. "Just go."

Kouga fell on his ass and groaned. "Asshole!" He quickly got up and ran away; easily dodging the girls attempt to grab him. With his quick speed, he ran around the lake and eventually caused a tornado made out of water and waited for the girls to get close enough before stopping. Soon enough, everyone who was affected by the potion was doused with water, soaking wet.

"My hair!" Yura groaned.

"My make up!" Kagura moaned, "It's running!"

"Was I running after Sesshoumaru?" Abi blinked.

"Was I actually running after Renkotsu?!" Kikyou blanched.

"I can't believe I went after Bankotsu!" Sango held her head.

"You can't believe that!? I kissed BOTH Miroku AND Bankotsu!" Kagome blanched, "I kissed Bankotsu? UGH, I DID!!"

"What were we fighting about?" Ayame asked as the other woman in question walked off.

"I feel so stupid!" Sango looked over at the guys, who cautiously walked over. "Are you guys alright?"

"Are you still turned on, Ayame?" InuYasha shuddered.

"No." Ayame innocently blinked and stopped herself. She looked down and shrieked. "MY ASS! IT'S SHOWING!" She tried to cover as much cleavage as possible.

"Whoa, you fit that skirt better than Kagome." Jakotsu added from a distance.

"I can't believe I kissed Bankotsu!" Kagome gagged and spat 'his' germs out.

"Hey! It wasn't a great experience for me either!" he snapped.

"Uhhh, Bankotsu?" Hiten tapped his shoulders.

"What?" Bankotsu snapped looking over but gulped when he saw all glares from the girls.

"Bankotsu, if I were you, I'd stay away from the manor for a few days." Jakotsu whispered in his ear.

"What am I?" Bankotsu groaned. "Cursed?"

"Pretty much." Naraku agreed.


End file.
